Baby Blues

I really don't understand how so many people have children and are horrible parents, yet God keeps blessing them. I know his reasons are not for me to know but that is probably my biggest question I would ask him that isn't connected to my family. So I was excited to go to see my OBGYN yesterday because I figured we could talk about my PCOS, which is a new diagnosis from my primary care doc, and then talk about my infertility issues. Well the nurse made it perfectly clear that because I have not had a pelvic ultrasound then she couldn't write down that I was there due to PCOS. Also that no insurances cover fertility issues so she couldn't put down that I wanted to have a baby. So she just put my problem with irregular periods. I talked to the doctor whom I hadn't seen in 8 years and then we went from there. So from thinking I was going to be discussing the diagnosis I was given an order for labs a pelvis ultrasound and then something that has been really bothering me, he let me know that a week after my ultrasound he wants me to come in for a procedure where he will scrap the tissue on my uterus and check it for cancer. Now as far as I know none of the women in my family have had cervical or uterine cancer so I am trying not to worry. Its really hard though. All I was is a normal period so I can try to have another baby before I'm 40! Is that really to much to ask? To Pray for? To Wish For? I know our situation inst super right now, Heck its not even good. But we are trying to make it better. WE don't drink or do drugs we are a family who love each other and even though we fuss and argue a lot right now its because of our current struggles. So I know we are not that bad of people! UGH! OK well I need to run this through Spell Check and then go get my Baby boy from school, its his half day!